Over the years, many many times, I have been to gates, boundaries, airports, railway stations, bus depots to do the one thing I am most uncomfortable doing. But, it is the one thing if I didn't do, every muscle, every cell in my body and soul would come to regret. So, time after time, year after year, I have mustered all the courage, put on the happiest of smiles, held on to it for as long as possible and gone ahead with doing that one thing, that is happy and sad, all at the same time. I despise mixed emotions.
A smile, a few polite last things, a hug, a glint in the eye, advice, notice the emerging pool in the eyes, pat on the back, shoulder hug, a hug, reassuring words, 'don't worry', the pool brims and spills, it rolls down from the corner of the eye, opens the flood gates, I cant possibly hold on to the break down, a hug - tighter this time, it lasts longer, pull back - its time, hold hands, linger, from the palm down to the tips of the fingers, look around, everything seems to rush and I wish for the super power to rewind time so I could do this in a happier way, but is there a happier way?, another hug, look deep in the eyes, remember all the times, soaking cheeks, a kiss, probably the last for a really long time, then the hand wave, the Goodbye.
*'A' leaves tomorrow and when he returns next, things would have changed. We'd be in the same city, but really too busy with our schedules. I hope tomorrow's goodbye will be to the last 5 years of knowing each other and a beginning, a fresh start to a new chapter. One that explores the other aspects of this deep friendship we have come to cherish.*
